Dispatches from an increasingly desperate situation

As I have noted on Twitter, The Sister is currently visiting Moms in Arizona. I, thankfully, am not. Here is a series of text messages I have received so far today from what appears to be a rapidly declining situation:

9:56 am Good morning! For breakfast I was presented with moldy raspberries and a broken spatula w/ no handle to make frittatas.

10:03 am Can't make this shit up.

10:04 am Why do you keep a broken fucking spatula? It's splintered and has NO HANDLE. Fuck.

10:27 am Today we are also featuring a Facebook tutorial.

1:12 pm Tutorial did NOT go well.

1:13 pm She is on FB but doesn't want to use it ever.

1:15 pm She doesn't understand it and doesn't want to figure it out.

1:26 pm Now trying to explain youtube. Sigh.

1:46 pm Every item of food in this house is revolting. I'm not having a good time.

1:56 pm She got mad and was like "You always say everything I have is rotten!" BECAUSE IT IS.

2:02 pm Then she opened her cookie tin where she stores cookies and kale chips together bc she only has one tin.

2:02 pm I said, these kale chips taste like oatmeal cookies. That was why.


2:05 pm Also as you may have guessed the cookies are stale.